The more I sit down to do this, the less I feel like it's for me. I grew up in a world of books, newspapers, magazines and postcards. The written word was the goal of everyone. Now, it's a side thought on the bottom of a footer which itself is only one sentence telling people the link is in the bio. The link is in the bio. When did that become a statement to fill everyone's life? There's currently an entire generation who runs on that philosophy. The link is in the bio.
When I started this magazine, I had to pick a template that fit what I was intending to do. Which, I have to say seems like the easiest thing on the planet until you actually go to do it. I literally spent 2 days scrolling through the template options, seeing what style fit my intentions. I didn't want to go with a food writer's theme as I have done enough food blogging the last few years. It's something I am wanting to push to the back burner - no pun intended. I also knew that I didn't want to rely on the movie critic's/producer's themes. Something else I'm trying to break free from. Both of which I spent the last decade up to my nose in. I was about to hit the yes on the fashion blog theme when I discovered the news layout. Perfect! A chance to do a little of everything.
But this got me thinking. What am I doing? Where am I going with this? Who do I think I am? Who do I think I am. "Gloomy Ghoul Tombs Monthly" is a themed series of posts I've been doing for about a year over on my facebook page. It was really nothing more than a post at the end of every month with a list of the other videos and articles I'd done on the facebook page that month. Styled like the cover of a magazine. I found I enjoyed that round up post more than I did the rest of it. So, when I decided to make it the focal point going forward; I had to ask myself what would the main theme be? The facebook page was started as a way to challenge myself to live Hallowe'en 365 days. After three years straight working on the page, I found myself drained and no longer in love with it. So many other "spooky people" seemed to have popped up around me. Like weeds in a flowerbed of dead carnations. I wasn't alone in the darkness anymore. Which sort of sucked to be honest. So where did that leave me? It was clear I just couldn't keep up with the bat-people or skeleton-crews. They were able to pump out their product at such break neck speeds, leaving me standing in the graveyard coughing on their dust. From Hallowe'en crafting, to spooky clothes shopping hauls, to decorating their haunted houses; my gothic suburban community left me mummified and covered with cobwebs.
I've been called "too weird, too goth" for average consumption and "not spooky enough" for goth consumption. But I can't be the only one to notice that "goth" has gone mainstream in the last few years.
If my genre is morbidly-spooktacular-demonic-chic; and mainstream has embraced it's dark side, do I still fit my genre? Or have we just blanketed ourselves in a gothic woolen dream of cozy greyness?
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